Sunday, June 26, 2005

Is There Anybody Out There?


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I look for deep meaning in nearly everything.
I am hopelessly searching for some type of reason.

My Mom works in an amusement park.
And yesterday while at work, my DEAD ex-boyfriends twin brother approached her.
He asked is she had a daughter named KATHRYN!
and obviously yes she does.
I don't even know if I feel like typing all this information down.
But I will give it a whirl.

Ok. Lets see.
My ex- boyfriends name is Aaron. He died from a brain tumor.
Sad. Really.
We were not together when he died. But I did see him about a month before he died.
We took a drive together.
He tried to kiss me and even though it felt so good. I stopped him. Because I was in a relationship with Tim. My now husband.
So he died a month or so later. I am vague on the details.

Aaron was my first love. I put him through some MAJOR SHIT! Sure sure we were young and dumb and all that but there was some serious issues at hand. Trust me. I really fucked with him. But he was fine. He got over my bullshit.

SO. Where was I?
Yesterday Eric, Aarons twin brother pops in to the mix.
I always think of Aaron. Like 2 days ago I was talking about him with this "Dude".

My mom just happened to be in this store that her and Aaron used to work in together.
LIKE 13 years ago.
And Eric saw her , and kept staring and staring and then he heard her talk and was sure she was my mom.
So they chatted and then my mom called me to tell me this oddball story. At least I find it odd.
So I tell Tim and he is like, who gives a flying HOOT?! Well, I DO! I DO!
Ok. Then a few hours later my cell phone rings and it is Eric.
Very cool.
We talked. And said we should have lunch.

So. Now I miss Aaron. And realize how so much of my life is gone.
I have really no pictures or any of his drawings. He drew really well.
Amazingly well really.

SO many memories I have forgotten.
Eric commented to my mom how Aaron and I were really funny. And how we would work off each others wit.
I can hardly remember.
I can. But I don't.

So I write all this shit. But still nobody understands how this makes me feel. I can't even properly describe it.
Or put in words the whole story of Aaron and I.
And now this.
At this time.
At this moment.

4 comments:

carrie said...

ouchie!!!!!!!!!!! Land of the Dead!
pow pow!

Kathryn said...

ha ha what?
i like just published and BOOM a comment!
FREAKY DEAKY MAN!

Kathryn said...

I HAD THE picture up there but then added the text.
so it just seems weird.

carrie said...

hmmm. i read the text and that was interesting. i think that it is very interesting. tim is prolly just miffed cuz he might not care about your dumb ex. y'know? not that i think that. but...

whatever. it is interesting. a bunch of coincidences. must be a message in there.