I grieve in my condition

Sarah Mclachlan is totally on the same page as me. We would be the BEST of friends I just know it!!

Lilith fair was a cool thing. My dad was one of the almost enlightened men that went to the show. He went alone. I should have gone too. Anyways he liked Sinead O conner the best. She does kick butt.

Music is a definite helper throughout my day. TV is not so much a helper. Unless I was on a show. like Dr.Phil or Oprah. I would prefer Oprah cause she seems nicer.
But music helps my soul. But my soul needs a lot of help. Music can't work miracles. At least not for me.
Fuck it I am turning off my fucking stereo.

More Importantly

I should just start painting my walls. I want to go with an aquamarine color. But I probably would make a huge mess and start crying.
Lately have trouble posting. I delete 90% of what I say.
Sometimes it seems pointless.

CARBON COPY

Some weird thing about afterlife and ghosts is on the TV in the other room. I hear it.
It sounds very serious and educated and narrated. Its late and I already have an active imagination.
GhoSTS! POLTERGEISTS! I feel like once I start to think about it and hear things and become receptive to it that the GHOSTS will start to try and get my attention even more. SO it is best that I just pretend they are not there and not even think of them. BUT NOW I JUST SAID TOO MUCH!

I bought three lanterns today.
I now collect lanterns.

do I LOOK DEAD? Cause I don't FEEL DEAD!

Usually I enjoy going to church for the most part. But today was different.
Today it was more like a living nightmare and I felt that to be true for the majority of the crowd. Even my Grandma.
Maybe God was truly present.
So we all felt naturally uncomfortable.

and it may have been one of the last times I ever go.



And Shaun of the Dead is the dumbest FUCKING movie EVER!
but brilliant.

I smeell like sweet goodness

good Sunday morning to you.
Last Sunday morning I was having breakfast with Goofy and his friends.
Yes I live in the past.

I feel pretty cranky and I have to start going to the gym.
Tomorrow I am going to the gym.
I was doing Tae Boe in my down stairs living room for awhile but it feels like a dungeon when I am down there and I don't like that. So forget that.

I also need to go to the dentist cause I just do.

I had to get a refill on this lotion for my face yesterday,and I had to wait in a twenty minute line TWICE and I finally got what I THOUGHT was my lotion, but in the evening when I went to apply it I discovered they gave me SOLUTION! NOT LOTION!! FUCKING STUPID! So I have to go back and wait in line AGAIN! Thst is the shit that makes me HATE the world. I know its just a little mistake put it makes my life that much more ANGRY!

Oh but don't you worry. I will be JUsT FINE! I have to go to church now.

Sour Grapes

It's been a strange day. I should not be blogging now. Itold myself that I would be cutting shitout of magazines tonight. So far that is not what I am doing. I do not know who is running the show up in my brain but I would really like it if I could do what I WANTED ONCE IN A WHILE......but then again maybe I am doing just what I want.
I tried to be cool and take a real ARTSY FARTSY picture of my grapes. Cause I am literally eating sour grapes right now. But I gave up cause I don't give a flying wooo hooo about being ARTSY. I just wish i was eating some SWEET goddamn grapes.
Today i have basically decided that everybody is full of it. "It" being themselves. SelfishPiGBAstards. Yes this does include you. Well, maybe not the DALI LAMA but I doubt highly that he would ever read my blog AND IF HE DID THAT would just be embarassing.
But I think I have had a day of awareness. An awareness that I hate the world, and the world hates me.
I hate the world because I need the world. And the world just has too much other stuff going on.
Sure once in awhile I feel somewhat in harmony with the world but mostly it is the feeling of disharmony that I have.
Me against the planet.
I hate you fuckers.
But I love you too.
but I hate you.

Same Picture Different Day

Yeah none of my pants fit me.
Thats a great feeling, when you are trying to get ready.

I may bowl today. Not sure.
I betcha a WILL EAT FOR SURE THOUGH!

the other day while in a store i stole MORE CANDY.
I opened up a bag and just starting eating Snickers.
Yes I had an accomplice.
thats all I have to say now.
Plus I feel the rushing feeling coming over me.
A horn has just been honked.

Face the Facts

OH YEAH this movie looks good!

I was mostly aggravated all day. real touchy.
I blame it on Groundhogs Day.

I just suggested that a whistle contest would be fun.
I have some good whistling skills.
But that skill really does not get me anywhere in life.
And nobody wants to play anyways.

Stupid Groundhogs Day.

at leasts it is Thursday and I get to watch my teen drama.

YOU ARE SO BAD TO ME

Yesterday I saw this little girl being dragged around by her idiot father. She was probably like 3 and he was walking all fast and her little legs could barely keep up. He was oblivious. Not even thinking about her just about HIM and where HE was going and all HIS plans.

SLOW DOWN A LITTLE! It really made me mad.

ANYWAYS.

My son knows the pledge of alligence by heart! I am impressed.

I wrote a 5 dollar check to a recovered crack addict yesterday.
I am so sweet.

I am TICKED OFF!

Your Inner Child Is Angry

You're not an angry person. But when you don't get your way, watch out. Like a very manipulative kid, you will get what you want. Even if it takes a little kicking and screaming.

How Is Your Inner Child?